Healthy Living: A second Chance

Summer is finally over for me.
Schools start tomorrow.

It's been really a long summer. I went through so much x)
I started this summer with so much sadness and depression in my heart. I was really going through a very difficult time in my life.  I was struggling with my sexuality issue, and I was struggling with my crush for this one person.

School went out the window for me. I really didn't care that much anymore because my heart was somewhere else. I had a hard time accepting myself. I am gay. And to be more precise. I'm bisexual. This summer has been a struggle for me to just come to term with my sexuality and accept myself.

To make matters worse, I had a crush on a girl who had a boyfriend. And things just got more and more confusing. I was growing more attached to her. My grades were slipping, and my heart and head always fought each other. My heart like the girl, but my head told me to go. Run as fast as I can because she was trouble.

It took me awhile to actually, follow through. I had a lot of help from so many people these summer. Oh, did I meantion I was 132 lbs starting this summer?!? My healthy living lifestyle really went down the drain too.

But, at the beginning of summer, I made a very important decision. I decided to let go of her. I wasn't going to pursue my crush anymore. My grades came back and I didn't make the honor roll. I got 2 B- in 2 of my core classes. But i forgive myself, because I realize that I couldnt' concentrate. My head and heart was emotionally invested in my situation with my crush and my sexuality.

I wasn't even sure if I was a lesbian or bisexual.

But after this summer adventure, I had many opportunities and time to reflect on my life. I met a lot of interesting people who slowly fill the empty gap in my heart. They help glue back the broken pieces of my broken heart. They show me that my sexuality is only part of me. I am a full person with flesh and color. I have a spirit, a dream, a goal, and life worth living. They restore my spirit and cleaned my mind.

I am more academically more competitive now. I have always wanted to be a doctor. But i doubt myself and my capability. But,  this struggle have made me want to be a physicna even more. You don't really know how much you want something, when you realize you lost something. Because this summer, when my grades was jeapordize. I thougth it was over for me. But, I won't let that be over for me. I want to do medicine in my future. And I will not stop until there is  a seat for me in medical school. There are so much things I want to do and medicine can provide me with skills to fulfill my purpose and dream in life. 

And slowly, I went to temple almost every night. I became closer to my religion. My "Qui Y" (Buddah's vietnamese name) is "Quang Dieu". Oh, and all of those trip to temple and reading the prayers books have enhanced my vietnamese.

And soon enough, I was able to stand up to my crush. We originally were gonna meet up and have coffee together. But, I rejected her offer. I couldn't have been prouder of myself. Because this action proves to me that, I might like girls, but I still have my morals and standards.

Being a bisexual is only a facelet of me. I am still me. I still have my morals and standard of who I will date and love. I may not be able to help who I fall for, but I can help who I end up with and choose to be with. To me, being gay doesn't mean you can be a homewrecker or ruining someone's else relationship. Being gay is just like being straight only the fact that you like the same gender. But eveything else should line up the same.

So, at the end of this summer, I kinda figure out my sexuality. I got ride of a trouble relationship. I upheld my moral by rejection a girl who I felf so much for. Endured the pain of depression and heartbreak. Mend my broken hearts by opening up to others. Exercise off my sadness and gain muscle while losing weight. Continue refining my heahtly living lifestyle by keeping track of my calories. Posting a video on youtube. Produce some beautiful photoshoots. Be a better daughter, and cousins.

I am proud of myself. I proud of who I am as a person, and the struggle I have overcome. I know I'm not perfect, but I believe I am much a more stronger person than I was the beginning of this year. I am thankful for everything that have happen to me this summer. I couldn't have done this alone, and I would not have been here today. Thank you so much summer 2012 for giving me a second chance.

Fall 2012, here I come. I know every there will always be trouble. "Every forest have it's own tigers" But, I know no matter what happen, I have come too far to ever give up on my dream and passion.

Healthy Living: How to Deal with a slip

I mess up today x___x

I had an appointment with my research professor today, and the appointment was at 12:15. But I thought it was 3:30 pm. So, I totally missed the appointment and I feel completely guilty and bad.
That was really irresponsible and unprofessional of me. I feel terrible. And on top of that, since I was feeling down already, I thought, what the heck, my as well stalk my old crush on facebook.  x___x

Wow, at the double wammy. I wasn't gonna visit my old crush facebook b/c i told myself to stay away. I haven't been to their page in over a month. It seem my old crushed been very inactive on facebook since the last time we talked. I don't know why, but I don't bother finding out. I'm not sure of how I stand now in my emotions, but I know things are different from before for me. I don't feel that much anymore. I listens to the old songs that I use to listen during those time period, and yea, it's quite sad, I then got bored of it really fast.

So, anyway, about my feeling guilty. I realize something is wrong here. I'm beginning my new year in school, and I can barely get my life down. I can't just based everything on memory anymore. There is so much things flying around and so many information, and so many issue I have to worry about that I can't keep track of everything anymore. I can't rely on my head all the time to remember on every appointment. This isn't summer anymore. I life is going to get busier now, and I need to find a solution that can help me keep track of all the important dates and plans that I am about to make in the future.

I feel bad to not showing up at my professor meeting, and I know this is a big let down for me because I wanted to look good to her so maybe one day, she can write me A GOOD LETTER of recomdemation. x( SOO BAD.

But, other than vent about it on here, I don't think there is anything else I can do. The deed has already been done. I know I will probably never have this opportunity like this every again, but I can't sit here and mope about it.

This really have me thinking. I realize that there are many setbacks in life, and for some of the setback, you really have no control over it. I was being irresponsible today by not getting the dates and time worked up. But I have learn an important lesson.

1. I need a planner where I can commit to. To check up daily and to keep myself in checked.

2. There are many setbacks in life, and some of them you are unprepared for and most of them are unexpected. But when life push you 2 step back, you have to work 4x harder to not only make up for what you have lost, but go 2 step beyond what you have done. This is call "Setting it even".

I really need to get down to business now and set myself straight. School is starting next week. There is no more time to mess around. I have the whole summer to be irresponsible and lazy. This quarter means a lot to be because my future depends on it.

Healthy Living: Talk to a mother

Today, I went to temple with my mom. We do so almost every night during the summer. Temple is a great release placed for my mom and it's a great place for me to brushed up on my vietnamese. I am capable of reading and understanding vietnamese all because of temple.

I wasn't going to write this blog today, but I wanted to mention something.

I remember during those dark time in my life, there are moments where I thought of sucicided. I would never let those through go on long, but I would be lying if they didn't pop up during those times. I know it's completely stupid to even think of something like that.

So, anyway, I saw a women in temple today. She is about my mom age, and she was putting away some books to the shelfs. I came to give her a hand, by telling her to give me all her books. I can carry her books to the shelves myself. She look at me for a second, and then she said it's okay. She said it might be heavy on me.

Afterward, she came and talk to my mom. I looked at her and I remember my mom used to tell me a story about one of her friend from temple. This women have lost her daughter who happen to be a couple years older than me. And for some reason, when that women looked at me today, I cannot but help but think that she have thought of her lost daughter. It's moments like this were this whole "sucided" thing came to mind.

I think one of the hardest thing in this world is a mother having to bury her own children. The pain must be unbearable. It's moments like this today, when she gazed at me, that she might have remember her daughter. And for that second, nothing hurts more to her in this world, to know that she have lost her eldest daughter. I cannot say anything because I'm simply a bystander.

But I cannot ever let that happen to my mom. I will not put my parents in that ordeal or experience. I need to take good care of myself, so my parents won't ever experience such pain. I owe it to parents to work hard and do well in school. I owe to my parents for the life I live today and all the blessing they have grant me. I won't ever think of something as stupid as suicide every again. My parents only have me. If something happen to me, I don't know what would happen to my parents. Therefore, I need to take good care of myself.

So, like they say, if you ever think of killing yourself. Talk to a mother who lost her daughter. Talk to parents who lost their only child. To them, their children is their lives, and if anything were to happen to their children, it would be like the world have ended for them. Thus, I think everyone and including myself, need to keep this in mind. 

Corner Wall: Con gai cua me

Con dâu nói : “Nấu nhạt tý bà lại chê nhạt nhẽo, giờ nấu mặn chút bà lại bảo nuốt không vô, rốt cuộc bà muốn sao đây?”

Mẹ nhìn thấy con trai vừa về đến nhà, một câu không rằng bèn gắp thức ăn bỏ vào miệng nhai. Cô ta hằn học nhìn chồng. Anh gắp thử một miếng ăn, nhả ra ngay tức thì.

Con trai nói : “Anh không phải đã dặn em rồi sao, mẹ bị bệnh không thể ăn quá mặn !”
“OK ! Mẹ là của anh, sau này do anh nấu nhé !” Con dâu giận dỗi đi thẳng vào phòng. Anh chỉ còn cách thở dài, và quay sang nói với mẹ : “Mẹ, đừng ăn nữa, con đi nấu mì cho mẹ ăn.”

Mẹ nói : “Không phải con có chuyện muốn nói với mẹ sao, có thì giờ hẵng nói, đừng để trong lòng !”

Anh con trai nói : “Mẹ à, tháng sau con được thăng chức, con sẽ rất là bận … còn phần vợ con, cô ta nói muốn ra ngoài kiếm việc làm, cho nên ……”

Ngay lập tức mẹ hiểu ý con trai muốn nói gì : “Con ơi, đừng gửi mẹ vào viện dưỡng lão nha con !” Giọng nói nức nghẹn như khẩn cầu van xin .

Anh trầm tư nghĩ ngợi một hồi lâu, trong đầu anh ta như đang cố tìm một lý do tốt hơn để thuyết phục mẹ : “Mẹ à, thật ra viện dưỡng lão không phải là một nơi không tốt, mẹ biết rồi đấy, khi vợ con kiếm được công việc, nhất định sẽ không còn thời gian chăm sóc mẹ chu đáo nữa đâu. Trong viện dưỡng lão vừa có cái ăn, vừa có chỗ ở, lại có người chăm sóc, không phải tốt hơn nhiều so với ở nhà hay sao ?”

Tắm xong, ăn tạm một tô mì gói, anh bèn đi vào phòng sách. Anh thờ người đứng trước cửa sổ, có vẻ do dự. Ngày ấy mẹ còn trẻ đã ở góa, ngậm đắng nuốt cay nuôi anh khôn lớn nên người, và còn gửi anh ra nước ngoài du học. Nhưng, bà chưa bao giờ dùng tuổi thanh xuân của mình đã một đời hy sinh vì anh đem ra uy hiếp mặc cả về sự hiếu thảo của anh, ngược lại là vợ đã đem hôn nhân ra uy hiếp anh ! Không lẻ phải cho mẹ vào viện dưỡng lão thật sao ? Anh tự hỏi bản thân, anh ta có chút không nhẫn tâm.

“Có thể cùng cậu đi hết cuộc đời là vợ cậu, không lẽ là mẹ cậu sao ?” Con trai của bác Tài thường hay nhắc khẽ anh như thế.

“Mẹ cậu đã lớn tuổi như thế, tốt số thì có thể sống thêm vài năm, Tại sao không tranh thủ thời gian đó sống thật hiếu thảo với bà cơ chứ ? Cây muốn lặng mà gió chẳng ngừng, con muốn phụng dưỡng mà người còn đâu!” Bà con họ hàng thường hay khuyên nhủ anh như thế.

Anh ta không muốn suy nghĩ thêm nữa, sợ mình sẽ vì thế mà thay đổi quyết định. Ánh mặt trời tắt dần những tia nắng chói chang và khuất dần sau ngọn đồi, trả lại bầu trời một màn đêm u tịch. Một ngôi nhà quý tộc dành cho người già được xây dựng ở vùng ngoại ô trên đồi núi.

Đúng thật, tiền càng chi ra nhiều, anh càng cảm thấy an lòng. Khi người con trai dắt mẹ bước vào đại sảnh, một chiếc ti vi 42 inch mới tinh đang chiếu một bộ phim hài, nhưng người xem nơi ấy không hề nở một nụ cười.

Những người già mặc cùng một kiểu áo, tóc tai đều na ná nhau đang ngồi cô quạnh trên chiếc ghế sofa, thần sắc đờ đẫn đến u buồn. Có người thì đang ngồi lẩm bẩm một mình, có người thì đang chầm chậm cúi người xuống muốn nhặt lấy một mẩu bánh vụn đang nằm trên sàn nhà.

Con trai biết mẹ thích nơi tươi sáng, vì thế đã chọn cho bà một căn phòng đầy đủ ánh sáng. Từ cửa sổ nhìn ra ngoài, dưới bóng râm là một vườn cỏ thơm ngát. Mấy cô y tá đang đẩy những người già ngồi trên xe lăn, cùng họ tản bộ dưới ánh hoàng hôn, bốn bề tĩnh lặng khiến cho người cảm thấy xót lòng. Dù hoàng hôn có đẹp bao nhiêu, ánh chiều tà rồi cũng dần buông xuống, anh ngậm ngùi tiếc nuối.

“Mẹ ơi, con … con phải đi rồi !” Mẹ chỉ biết gật đầu.

Khi anh đi khỏi, đôi tay gầy guộc của mẹ giơ lên vẫy chào anh, miệng không còn một chiếc răng, đôi môi khô tái nhợt muốn lên tiếng gọi với anh, nhưng gọi không thành tiếng, lộ ra một ánh mắt ngập ngừng đậm vẻ u sầu.

Lúc này con trai chợt nhận ra mái tóc của mẹ đã bạc dần, đôi mắt sâu thẳm và khuôn mặt xuất hiện nhiều vết chân chim. Mẹ quả thật đã già đi rồi !

Anh chợt hồi tưởng lại một số chuyện ngày xưa. Năm đó anh mới 6 tuổi, mẹ có công chuyện phải về quê, không tiện dắt anh theo, nên đành phải gửi tạm nhà bác Tài vài hôm. Lúc mẹ sắp rời khỏi, anh sợ hãi ôm chặt lấy chân mẹ không chịu buông, khóc thật thê lương và kêu gào trong nước mắt : “Mẹ, mẹ ơi, đừng bỏ con mà đi ! Mẹ đừng có đi mẹ ơi !” Cuối cùng mẹ cũng không bỏ lại anh một mình ……

Anh vội rời khỏi phòng, tiện tay đóng cửa phòng lại, không dám ngoái đầu nhìn lại, anh sợ, sợ cái ký ức ấy hiện về như bóng ma cứ lờn vờn bám lấy anh.

Anh về đến nhà, nhìn thấy vợ và mẹ vợ đang hăng tiết vứt bỏ tất cả những vật dụng trong phòng của mẹ với khuôn mặt khoái chí vui mừng.

Một chiếc huy chương ----- đó là chiến lợi phẩm đoạt giải nhất trong cuộc thi viết văn hồi tiểu học của anh với chủ đề “MẸ CỦA TÔI” ; Một quyển từ điển Anh – Việt ----- đó là món quà đầu tiên mẹ đã dành dụm tiền chi tiêu cả tháng trời để mua tặng anh ! Và còn nữa, chai dầu gió mẹ phải xoa trước khi đi ngủ, không có anh xoa dầu cho bà, gửi bà đến viện dưỡng lão thì còn ý nghĩa gì nữa kia chứ ?

“Đủ rồi, đừng vứt nữa !” Anh tức giận.

“Rác nhiều như thế, không đem vứt đi, thì sao có thể chứa được đồ của tôi.” Mẹ vợ thở hổn hển nói.
“Thì đúng rồi đấy ! Anh mau mau đem cái giường cũ nát của mẹ anh khiêng ra ngoài đi, ngày mai tôi sẽ mua cho mẹ tôi một chiếc giường mới !”　　

Một đống ảnh lúc ấu thơ chợt hiện ra trong mắt anh, đó là những tấm ảnh mẹ đã dẫn anh đi sở thú chụp lưu niệm.

“Tất cả đều là tài sản của mẹ tôi, một thứ cũng không được bỏ !”

“Anh tỏ thái độ gì vậy hả ? Dám lớn tiếng với mẹ tôi ưh, tôi bắt anh phải xin lỗi mẹ tôi ngay lập tức !”

“Tôi cưới cô là có nghĩa vụ yêu thương mẹ cô, tại sao ? Cô lấy tôi thì không thể yêu thương mẹ tôi được sao ?”

Cơn mưa sau đêm tối mang một chút hơi lạnh lẽo, đường phố vắng lặng đìu hiu, xe cộ và người đi trên đường thưa thớt dần. Một chiếc xe hơi đang chạy vượt đèn đỏ và phóng qua những biển cấm nguy hiểm, không ngừng tăng tốc phóng nhanh trên đường. Chiếc xe hơi ấy chạy thẳng đến viện dưỡng lão được nằm trên lưng chừng đồi núi, anh ngừng xe và phóng nhanh lên lầu, mở cửa phòng ngủ của mẹ. Anh thờ người đứng nhìn, mẹ đang lấy tay xoa đôi chân phong thấp của mình âm thầm khóc trong đêm.

Bà nhìn thấy con trai đang cầm trên tay chai dầu gió, cảm thấy an ủi và nói : “Mẹ quên lấy đi, cũng may con mang đến cho mẹ !”

Anh bước vội đến bên mẹ và quỳ xuống.

“Tối rồi, tự mình mẹ có thể xoa được mà, ngày mai con còn phải đi làm, hãy về nhà đi !”

Anh ngập ngừng một hồi lâu, nhưng cuối cùng không kìm được cảm xúc, anh khóc và nói : “Mẹ ơi, con xin lỗi, xin hãy tha thứ cho con ! Chúng ta cùng về nhà nhé !”

 Nhu Quynh- Thuong Ve Mien Trung

Improvement: The Art of War

Notes from Art of WAR ... 
                                                                 

 

"All men can see these tactics whereby I conquer, but what none can see is the strategy out of which victory is evolved."

Planning: 

"All warefare is based on deception"

Strategy:

"Knowing the enemy enables you to take the offensive. Knowing yourself enables you to stand on the defensive. Attack is the secret of defense; defense is the planning of an attack. "

"If you know the enemy and how yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer defeat If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle."

"3 ways in which a ruler can bring misfortune upon his army: 
1. By commanding the army to advance or to retreat, being ignorant of the fact that its cannot obey. This is called hobbling the army.
--> "A kingdom should not be governed from without, and army should not be directed from within." The general should not be in the thick of his own troops, but a little distance apart. Otherwise, he will be liable to misjudge the position, and give wrong orders."

2. By attempting to govern a army in the same way as he administers a kingdom, being ignorant of the condition which obtain in an army. This cause restlessness in the soldier's mind.
--> " Humanity and justice are the principles on which to govern a state, but not an army; opportunism and flexibility, on the other hand, are military rather than civil virtues."

3. By employing the officiers of his army without discrimination
" Use the right man in the right place."
--> " The skill employer of men will employ the wise man, the brave man, the covetous man, and the stupid man. For the wise man delights in establishing his merit, the brave man likes to show his courage in action, the covetous man is quick at seizing advantages, and the stupid man has no fear of death."

"5 essential for victory: 
1. He will win who knows when to fight and when not to fight.
2. He will win who knows how to handle both superior and inferior forces: (superior means abudunant force, make easy ground; with an inferior one, make for difficult ground.
3. He will win whose army is animated by the same spirit throughout all its ranks
4. He will win who, prepared himself wait to take the enemy unprepared.
5. He will win who has military capacity and is not interfered by the sorvergein:

Tactical Disposition:

"The good fighters of old first put themselves beyond the possibility of defeat, and then waited for an opportunity of defeating the enemy. "

"To secure ourselves against defeat lies in our own hands, but the opportunity of defeating the enemy is provided by the enemy himself. Thus the good fighter is able o secure hismelf defeat, but cannot make certain of defeating the enemy."

"Hence the saying: One may know how to conquer without being able to do it."

"The general who is skilled dfenses hids in the most secret recesses of the earth, he who i skilled in atack flashes forth from the topmost heights of the heaven. Thus on the one hand we have ability to protect ourselves; on the other, a victory that is complete."
-> the "secret recesses" as the hills, rivers, the other natural freature which will afford shelter or protection to the attacked. The "topmost heights of heaven" as the phases of weather which may be turned to account by attacking party.

"What the ancients called a clever fighter is one who not only wins, but excel in winning with ease"
--> "He who only sees the obvious, wins his battles with difficulty; he who looks below the surface of things, wins with ease."

"He wins his battles by making no mistakes. Making no mistakes is what establishes the certainty of victory, for it means conquering an enemy that is already defeated. Hence the skilful fighter puts himself into a position which makes defreat impossible, and does not miss the moment for defeating the enemy."

"Thus it is that in war the victorious strategist only seeks battle after the victory has been won, whereas he who is destined to defeat first fights and afterwards looks for victory."
-->"In warefare, first lay plans which will ensure victory, and then lead your army to battle; if you will not begin with stratagem but rely on strength alone, victory will no longer be assured."

-------
Ex: Strategy: Don't expect to wake up on time when sleeping late.
Ex: Taticts: Sleep early
Ex: Plan: (applying tactics) Go to bed at 12:00 AM! No later!
--------

Energy: 

"The control of a large force is the same principle as the control of a few men: it is merely a question of dividing up their numbers."
--> "Fighting with a large army under your command is nowise different from fighting with a smll one: it is merely a question of instituting signs and signals."

"To ensure that your whole host may withstand the brunt of the enemy's attack and remain unshaken-this is effected by manoeuvres direct and indirect."
-->"In presence of the enemy, your troops should be arrayed in normal fashion, but in order to seure victory abnormal manoeuvers must be employed. "

"In all fighting, the direct method may be used for joining battle, but indirect methods will be needed in order to secure victory. These who are so inextricably interwoven in all military operation."

"In battle, there are not more than two methods of attacks--the direct and the indirect; yet these two in combination give rise to an endless series of manoeuvres"
--> "the direct and indirect lead on to each other in turn. It is like moving in a circle- you never come to an end. Who can exhaust the possibilities of their combination?"

"The quality of decision is like the well-timed swoop of a falcon which enables it to strike and destroy its victim."

Improvements: Strategy

                                                      A picture above is a "latticework"

An excerpt from:

Strategy is not a plan

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Strategy definition:
Victory is achieved in the way of conflict by ascertaining the rhythm of each opponent, by attacking with a rhythm not anticipated by the opponent, and by the use of knowledge of the rhythm of the abstract. - Miyamoto Musashi, samurai strategist, 17th century Japan

Strategy isn’t beating the competition, it’s shaping and  serving the customer’s real needs. – Kenich Ohmae, Managing Director, McKinsey & Co, Tokyo Office

MY DEFINITION: "strategy: is a pattern to a course of action." 

Plan definition:
A plan is an intention about how to get from where we are now to where we want to be in the future.

Boyd’s views strategy as a tapestry of mental models–models produced through a constant cycle of destruction and creation and via the building of snowmobiles,

Strategy is a mental tapestry of changing intentions for harmonizing and focusing our efforts as a basis for realizing some aim or purpose in an unfolding and often unforeseen world of many bewildering events and many contending interests.

Charlie Munger, Vice-Chairman of Berkshire Hathaway and Warren Buffett’s partner, recognized the same need for strategy to consist of multiple mental models utilizing a latticework metaphor as opposed to Boyd’s tapestry.

You’ve got to have models in your head. And you’ve got to array your experience—both vicarious and direct—on this latticework of models. You may have noticed students who just try to remember and pound back what is remembered. Well, they fail in school and in life. You’ve got to hang experience on a latticework of models in your head.
What are the models? Well, the first rule is that you’ve got to have multiple models—because if you just have one or two that you’re using, the nature of human psychology is such that you’ll torture reality so that it fits your models, or at least you’ll think it does.

What this is all highlighting is the relationship between strategy and a plan. Plans of some kind or another will always be necessary, but they are a lower-order good than strategy. Strategy guides the plan, it shapes it to better match an ever-changing reality, it modifies it, discards it (a key part leaders seem to forget).  But, alas, they are not the same thing…not even close.

 

There are many kind of strategies, just as there are many kinds of patterns. 

 
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An excerpt from:

Strategy, The Art of Everything Else 

It's like the deer that you spot in the field behind your house when you're a kid. You want so badly to run right up to it, yet if you do so you'll quickly scare it away. So you begin walking, slowly, quietly...tangentially. You walk in circle that imperceptibly decreases in its diameter over time. You stalk, painstakingly aware of your own presence and all of the unintended consequences it brings to the situation, its foreignness. Your every move has the potential to shatter a fragile ecosystem. Of course, the deer inevitably runs, it always does. You step on a twig, the wind changes direction and the creature catches your scent, reality changes before you can lock the moment in time. But there is always a brief instant before the deer escapes that both of you freeze and lock eyes, the hair stands on both of your necks and you know that you've gotten closer than you were supposed to get...a little closer than the last time.

When devising strategy one is chasing after a constantly-changing reality. We live in a state of, as Boyd put it, perpetual novelty. The world around us provides us with an infinite amount of data or inputs that we must try to filter in some sort of intelligent manner. To do so we create mental models or paradigms through which we filter the world in an effort to provide a coherent narrative. "What's going on here?" is often an incredibly difficult question to answer when posed at a global or even national level. Like the deer in the field, the perfect answer to that question, or a completely perfect match to reality is impossible to pin down -- the second you try, reality changes, making some part of your strategy irrelevant. All one can hope for is to get a little closer than the last time.

 ...

"In his book 'Naval Strategy: Compared and Contrasted with the Principles and Practice of Military Operations on Land,' published in 1911, Mahan compared naval officers to artists. He wrote that artists had to learn certain techniques, mediums and certain skills, but that wasn't what made their artwork great. In the end 'art, out of materials which it finds about, creates new forms in endless variety,' artists take those foundation basics and then mix and match them based on inspiration and experience to create a masterpiece. History helps us understand that frequently there are no right answers to military questions of strategy or leadership. There are only 'sound conclusions,' which are drawn from understanding basics and history."

Approaching strategy in an indirect fashion, as more of an art than science may make some uneasy, specifically those who find safe haven in the concreteness of checklists and formulas. Yet, the nature of strategy reflects the nature of the world. It is infinitely complex, it is always changing and it is filled with humans that often do irrational things. Literature (see Charles Hill) and psychology have as much of a place at the strategy table as military history...as do mathematics, physics, political science and technology. So, when asking, "what must one study to be a great strategist?" the answer seems to be, "everything else."

 

Healthy Living : Coming of Age

Well, despite everything that happened this summer. I realized that something in me has changed this summer or "renewed". It's my sense of responsibility and the task that I need to do for my future ahead. I never really thought of this, but a conversation with an old friend yesterday, have startle me at something.

I asked her what she like more: high school or College. And she said highschool. IT's odd. Because, usually, people say that they prefer college a lot more because of the excess freedom. But my friend actually put that college is harder because it requires more responsiblity and task.
Unlike me, who freeload off my parents for many things, she have to actaully work to helped her parents pay the house mortage, gas to drive, food on the table, clothes to wear, electricity bills, water bills, and etc. All this sound foreign to me because I never really thought about it. I never really did. Because I never lived like that before. My responsiblity from high school to college only changed by the fact that I need to drive myself to school. But everything else, is just the same.

Now, I realized that I do have a lot more responsibility. I'm not 15 anymore where the worst thing in the world is that i got into a fight with my best friend. Now, I have to really think about my future and the life I want to lead.

I know for career wise, I am very interested in medicine and I'm trying to head down that career. But I haven't been investing. I need to start being more financially accountable for all my spending and keep record of my monthly budgets. I can't freeload off my parents forever. I need to get my academic grades together, study for MCAT, and also get my hospital volunteers hours in, research project published and presented, as well as getting letters for my MCAT school.

I also want some mentors. People who I looked up too, and people who I can come in talk to. I want to get to know more professors at school and really be more involved in clubs. I need to start holding office positions in club as well developing better study strategies skills. Oh, AND I NEED TO WATCH MY WEIGHT. GOSH -___- I kinda mess up in that department for awhile now. Let's hope I get my ducks all align.

I hope I can make this work. It's seeem like a laundry list from here and I'm nto quite sure how I'm going to get all of this done.


I need to start understanding the basic of  "INVESTING"
FINANCIAL WALL:
1. http://www.schaefersblog.com/
2. http://www.schaefersblog.com/3-investment-principles-every-young-person-should-know-1-time-value-of-money/
3. http://www.schaefersblog.com/3-investment-principles-every-young-person-should-know-2-pay-yourself-first/
4. http://www.schaefersblog.com/3-investment-principles-every-young-person-should-know-3-dollar-cost-averaging/

5. STUDYINGHACK: http://calnewport.com/blog/

here are some TIPS:

1.  Stay true to who you are and your values as it will be a compass.
If anything, your early 20s has probably challenged your beliefs & values as you’ve either ventured off to college or into the real world. Stay true to your beliefs and values  because it is a part of who you are.

Healthy Living:Staying Strong

"So find the beauty in the pain. Nothing bad comes without anything good with it. If one door closes another opens. "

GOOD MORNING

 Today, I was a little.. just a little down because of what happen earlier this summer. It's not much. But it was enough temptation to make me do something I would regret. Luckily, I kept my wit. I wasn't going to let this get to me. I came too far and try too hard to give up now. Summer is ending and Autumn is here. I have trained my heart out. I have sweat like crazy. I have ran myself silly to be where I am right now. I am stronger than I was earlier this summer. Physically and mentally. School is starting, and here to another new chapter in my book.

Wasteful Tears by Navi
I love running to the beat of this song!

Healthy Living: Moving

So, I haven't kept update with this website lately, once again xD
It's because I moved! :D It's rediculuous. I love the new house. It's very spacous and have enough room for my family.

But I havent' been to the gym lately and it's really bothering me because I felt like I'm gaining weight. This week will be a lot of  celebration for my family. We are having a house warming party and of course, there will be plenty of food for everyone. I'm excited, but it's going to be a lot of work for my family.

Last week, I spent most of my time organizing my house and just getting things settle. Now, it's time to show my whole relative where we live. WEll, at this new house I am gonna have to transfer gym. So, haha, I hope everything will be okay!