Healthy Living: Something Got to Give

Something Got To Give:

Jewl's was right. I was burned out. So, I spent some time off, and thinking about things. I try to think back of where I went wrong. What happen that took me off tray, so that I am to where I am today.

Admittedly, I'm not the happiest camper. It's not because of my circumstance. I thought maybe because of MCAT or the physic class that is driving me down. Maybe it's the anticipation of the application processes for medical school.

And yes, those does play a factor to the stress and burnout. But it's not the only one. I think I also faced another personal problem. I am not at peace with myself.

As crazy and confusing as that sound, it's probably truer than true.

Today, when I was driving home from school. I stopped at a red light and I looked acrossed me. I saw a blond hair girl about the same age as me. She was sitting in the driver seat of her own car with the window rolled down. What stroke me as unusual was that she started pulling out her piped and started smoking weed.

In my head, I was expecting her to exhail the smoke and let out a smile. After all, isn't that what drugs do to you? You smoke it because it makes you happy? From what I studied, it was supposed trigger chemical released in your brain and it was suppose to make you feel good. However, when she let out the smoke, she wasn't smiling. Her facial expression was a little sad. She wasn't happy at all. She seems more depressed as each time she took in another blow.

Now, why is that? Why is this girl not smiling? Maybe she has already reached her tolerance on drugs and marijuana just doesn't do it for her. Maybe.

But again, it hit me. She reminds me of some alcoholic who drinks during their depression. Yes, the drug and alcohol will make you forget about your problems for a moment. But it sure doesn't fix it. And once you are sober again, your problem is still there. It almost feel like your running away from your problem, but it will catch up to you soon. And there we are again, square one again.

By this time, the light was already green, and I drove away.
But this made me thought about own problem. I'm not at peace with myself. But sitting here and complaining about it will not make it go away. I can't sit these things out. I have to face my problem.

I have to have a different mindset. And I think I been doing some things that is making me unhappy. I need to clear my head. I have to removed myself away from negative energy. And the first to go is TUMBLR!

Oh, I followed a lot of people who are unhappy and not satisfied with their life. They reblogged some of the most depressing things. And, I see these things everyday. And it make me feel bad. So, I think to myself. Something got to give... and that is first to recover my inner self.