After my recent breakup, I felt so lost. It made me have a lot of insecurity. I felt maybe she broke up with me because I wasn't pretty enough or she got tired of me. I wasn't sure, but I feel very insecure about my looks and my womanly physic.
It doesn't really matter now what has happen. It matter that this is my new reality. People told me I should focus on myself and learn to love myself. Give it time, focus on self improvement, and live life.
So, this is my attempts to improve myself. I am tired of thinking about my breakup. I am tired of spiraling every single time I have a though of her. The dear girl is gone, but my brain and my heart can't seem to leave me alone.
Everything reminds me of her. It suck so bad.
But okay, the real reason for this post to is to start something new. I want to put the past behind me. I want to make my little girl happy. I always wanted to be an attractive and pretty girl. I been nerd for so long in my life that I sometime find it hard to figure out to how to an attractive pretty girl.
So okay, I been wanting to work on this project for the longest time.
I want to learn the art of being beautiful. I don't mean inner beauty. I want vanity. I want to look so good that when I walk in the room, people notice me. I want to play on my feminem features. I want that typical instagram beauty. I want to look like an attractive girl and exude the confidence. I am not doing this for any other girl. I want to do this for myself so that I will never forget myself in my next relationship.
I would like to call this next chapter: The Vanity Affairs.
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